Monday, January 25, 2010

life is good!!!

Hello Friends! I am so sorry for not having any pictures to share! Please forgive me. I have been without home internet for awhile. (Ollie the cow dog chewed through the chord, I recently discovered. More on that later.)

I'm back to school and I am taking a full time load. I am enjoying my classes so far. My professors are all so very different, which makes for not so ordinary days. I have recently applied for a job at a fun restaurant/bar kind of place and I feel that the interview went well. Still no word... but I figure it will play out just as it should. I have started yoga and I LOVE LOVE LOVE it! For the first time, I feel as though I have found a form of exercise that I would love to do every day. The girls are doing well. Brooklyn was recently recognized for being a good citizen in her class. Charlotte is suddenly saying everything. Lately she asks, "Whas dat?" about nearly everything. This is how they learn. I love her curiosity. Brooklyn is getting long and lean, her little face is just looking so much older. We have talks frequently. Sometimes we snuggle and talk about horses. Sometimes we snuggle and talk about dreams. Sometimes we snuggle and talk about our lives and what our goals are. I know better than to treat her like a grown up or a friend, but I think it is important to have these kinds of talks with daughters. I want her to know me. Really know me. She knows where I go to school, and what my dreams are. She tells me what makes her happy and how friends at school treat her. Sometimes parents can get so caught up in the everyday rigamarole and the never ending to-do list that they forget to slow down and just enjoy the company of their babies. I really like my kids. They are turning into way cool people. They are so very different and yet so similar, and I wouldn't change a thing about them.

I recently had laser surgery on my eyes. I refer to it as my own personal miracle. It is a miracle. I was previously legally blind without correction- worse than 20/800. I had surgery on a friday morning, and on saturday morning I read 20/15! God is good. That is all I have to say about that. And, it is amazing to wake up, open your eyes, and see. I will never take it for granted.

The bathroom is almost finished! I have a shelf and mirror to paint... then its done! I am trying to work steadily through one project at a time, but I must admit I have home project/painting ADD. Of course, you know this about me and love me anyway.

I have some amazing friends. Like, sisters-from-another-mother-that-really-love-each-other kind of friends. I am so blessed to have authentic, humble, loving women in my life. You won't hear a one of us talk bad about another. You will never feel judged. You will be told the truth, not just icecream cones. In our circle, you are welcome and beautiful and adored. When you are hurting, the group will nurse your wounds. When you are afraid, they will lend you their courage. When you overly excited, the group will get excited for you. We break bread together. We laugh til we cry together. We cry til we laugh together. I believe we all walk through life, stronger women, because we have each other. The funny thing is, I am not so good at intimacy with women. Or at least I wasn't. But I desperately wanted real friends. I'm not the girl who has BFFs from high school. I prayed for friends. For months and months. It started with one, and now there are many! Ladies- make friends. Pray for them. Find people who inspire you and who are positive and gravitate toward them. Now, more then ever, I believe that good friends are crucial to discovering yourself and finding your bliss. I had one friend: Emily. Through some prayer and putting myself out there, (including a blind friend date :o) I now know and love: Vanessa, April, Erin, Abi, Chandra, Emily, Laurel, Kat, and I am making new friends all the time!!! I have to say, my mom is my original, til death do us part best friend. Emily is my angel friend. Vanessa is my soul mate friend. April is my older sister/motherly friend. Erin is my quietly bold, encouraging friend. Gosh, I'm feeling like the luckiest girl ever!

Life is so good.

I'm going to need my internet for school, so I will get it up and going soon. Which means pictures of my bathroom, of my besties. And who knows what else...oooh...I have some fabulous flea market finds to share! I haven't done that for a while.

I hope that your year is off to a great start! I hope that where ever you are, you have some joy to share. I hope that you know some amazing women, who are only a phone call away. I hope that you dream...

Tuesday, January 5, 2010

Happy New Year!

Happy New Year Friends!!! I welcome 2010, and all that it will bring! I am optimistic about this year. I am hoping for a year of simple things. Simple joys. Simple days. Simplicity. Over the last seven years, my life has been complicated. I have been on one long roller coaster ride, and I feel like I have finally gotten off. It is so hard to surrender things to God. For me, it is so hard to trust. I have been trying to get to know God as my Dad, and thankfully I have some wonderful friends who are helping me with all of this. I am hoping that wherever I am, whatever our circumstances, I can feel content and peaceful. I have started yoga and I love love love it! The girls and I are making one big girly room out of our downstairs family room, and we are redoing the downstairs bathroom. I hope to host many girl's nights in our new creative/office/workout/sewing/whirlpool tub/big tv space! I have some awesome helpers... Please notice Brooklyn's fabulous outfit...tights, shirt over shirt, swimsuit bottoms, fuzzy backpack. My girl puts together the craziest outfits! I am convinced she will be famous one day. She really loves helping with projects, and here she is taking out screws for the door pulls.

We are painting the room a pretty blue green color. (Well, I am. ;o) And I painted the awful builder honey brown cabinet a creamy white.

Charlotte helps too. (Ignore the mess.) Here are my girlies sanding one of the cabinet doors prior to painting. I look at these pictures and I feel this sense of pride... like my little girlies don't yet think that there is any task they can't do or help with. In our home, women change light fixtures and tile floors and mud walls and paint rooms. We also have toenail painting parties, do our hair and make-up, dance and sing, and snuggle. Life with my two daughters is amazing. It is beautiful. Sometimes I have these moments when I just look at them, and I feel like the luckiest woman in the whole wide world.
(Charlie is wearing a diaper in this picture.)
I read blogs of other families. Every once in awhile, I long for a more traditional family. I long for a partner. I long to know what it feels like to be married. I wonder if I can be enough for two girls who deserve the best life has to offer. God kinda shushes my thinking. This is my lot. This is my life. And there is no point in wishing it to be different. And I have a feeling that the three of us are going to be just fine. Better than fine. I think our little family will be strong, beautiful, bonded, best friends, and we three girls will know God so intimately that nothing else will really matter. I like that. I like knowing that God lives in our home. I like knowing that when I lay in bed at night, finally quietness exists, and half my bed is full of notebooks and journals and self-help books and a Bible that has surely seen better days.... God is right there with me. He is enjoying watching me smile as I find that scripture that is perfect in that moment. He is in every cup of hot tea that warms my body. He is in the soft pillows, the warm quilts. The pretty dresses hanging in my closet. He is in the warm socks from a woman I love like a sister. He is in the unexpected late night text from Emily, who just thinks of me. He is in the pretty metal bed that was exactly what I was looking for, and $20 at a thrift store. He is in the comfy jammies that are completely practical and not at all pretty. He is in my heart. He is in my heart.
This year, I want God to fill up every nook and cranny of my life. I want to exude His love, as well as I can. I want to make people laugh, and give away love like its my job. I want to smile and laugh and wear pretty vintage dresses. I want to take care of body. I want to try new foods and stick with yoga, and travel. I want to snuggle my girls until they are sick of me. I want to cook big dinners for the people I love. I want to fix up my home, one room at a time, because I love my home. Because it is a home to royalty- princesses who surely deserve beautiful surroundings. This year, I want to serve. I want to just love on people. I want to love better- starting with loving myself.
Here's to the miracle of a new day! Here's to a new beautiful year! Here's to the chance to create the life we were designed to live! Here's to inviting God in your home and heart! Here is to finding peace and contentment, wherever you are...