Monday, October 12, 2009


Forgive me, as this post might seem all over the place.

I have taken to drinking tea. I have tried several kinds lately. Fall here has been especially cold (In fact, it's like we skipped fall altogether!) and that has me looking for something warm to drink. Because of our strangely cold weather, the garage sale has been postponed till spring. It will certainly give me enough time to price things!

I think I might be a worry wart. I seem to have a day of worrying every month, where suddenly I am overwhelmed by everything there is to worry about... you know how it goes. Isn't it funny? Worry is so wasteful! Usually my mom or Austin keep me grounded with their reassuring "everything will be alright" speech. Maybe I just need the chance to say out loud all those worries that muddy my mind. 

Life is happening. Right now. I am living in my life and the days become years, and nobody is going to create the life I want for my girls and myself, except me. These are the kinds of thoughts that keep haunting me. Brooklyn will be six in less than a month! How did that happen? Where does the time go? 

I know it is very natural for most people to make choices about their lives, for themselves. For some people, they are at A and they want to reach B and there are several choices they make to get them there. This is where my indecisiveness gets the best of me. There are too many variables. There are too many uncertain outcomes. There are too many options and too many unknowns and no guarantees. Add to that the opinions of others and their expressions of exactly what they think you should do, and you have the perfect recipe for the rut of indecisiveness. I am so afraid to make big decisions, and once I do, I want everyone in my life to give me permission to make those decisions. Isn't that silly? At the core of this, is a lesson on trusting God. Sometimes I seem to forget that God is Lord over my life. He is in control. I'll get it...

I have made one decision, though. And I feel pretty good about it. I want a dog. I mostly want a dog for Brooklyn and Charlotte, because they are so in love with every animal they meet. I have been checking our local humane society's web page almost daily, waiting for the one. I think I have found her. I will meet her tomorrow and report back to you if we add a family member! 

I am totally excited about Where the Wild Things Are coming out on Friday! We will be taking the girls for sure. Okay, I promise the next post will be way better, with pretty pictures to boot!

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